The effort a child makes is largely based on the message she hears. When a child knows someone will excuse her, she will not work.
No matter how difficult the task or the situation, the child must be pushed to continue her quest. She may not achieve the ultimate goal, but by working forward, she will not doubt, achieve more than she first expected.
While you allow your child to wallow in her own self doubt, and frustration, there will be another parent who is making no excuses for his child. Very shortly your child will be eclipsed by the children who are not excused from hard work.
I continue to watch society explain how someone is downtrodden, and can’t do better than his lot in life. Simply put, telling a child he can’t, means he won’t.
For nearly half of my career I taught intelligent kids who experienced limited, academic success. (Yes, that’s possible) Most of the students initially entered my program defensive, and with low confidence. I could very well have empathized with them. Instead, I allowed no excuses. I expected every student to not only pass, but they were also going to excel. And that’s exactly what they did. Communicating my confidence in their intelligence, made them believers and ultimately, successful students.
No one has confidence in a child, like a parent. Push your kids toward success.
God bless your family.